Think like your worst critic

One of the most persistent questions I get from the participants of my corporate personal branding workshops is, “What if something I say online becomes controversial and I get trolled?”.

There are variations to this question, like “What if I get into trouble for something I say online?” or “What if my employer gets into trouble for something I say online?”… and so on.

The fear behind all these questions is similar: getting into some trouble because of something you said online. The usual logic goes: “In the name of personal branding, why bother sharing anything online? That way, I can completely avoid any potential trouble and stay safe”.

That logic is equal to: “What if the vehicle I drive/ride meets an accident and I die/get severely injured? So, let me stay where I am and not travel at all!”.

Here is how I suggest dealing with this fear.

Step 1: Consider if what you are planning to say online fits your personal brand definition.

What is a ‘personal brand definition’? I gave an analogy for the concept of ‘personal brand definition’ in my chat with Coach Jay Kumar for this ‘Stories that shift’ podcast. Take a look.

So, if what you plan to say does not fit into those 5 windows, or within what you have defined for yourself as your ‘personal brand definition’, think again – why do you want to say that online, to complete strangers?

Ok, you do want to share what you have in mind, even if doesn’t fit into your personal brand definition. Fair enough. Next…

Step 2: Consider who the intended audience for it should be.

Is it people you know, and people who know you? Then, you should be opting for a channel that reaches directly to people you know/who know you. Like a WhatsApp Group. Or a Facebook Group. Or an email to select people. Or a private, friends-only Facebook post.

Ok, so you decide that you want the whole world (potentially) to know what you are planning to say. Meaning: You want to post it as a public post on LinkedIn/Twitter/Facebook/Instagram, with your name and identity clearly behind it.

Sure. Next…

Step 3: Think like your worst critic!

This is the most important part.

So, write whatever you had to – get it all out. Remember not to write it on the digital platform by clicking on ‘new post’. No.

Write it as a draft, elsewhere. Use Google Docs, or MS Word, or whatever. But not on the platform itself. That usually leads you to rush into posting what you want without adequate thought, or worse, you could lose your draft/post if something happens to the tab/window/page. Google Docs, for instance, autosaves your drafts, so it surely helps.

After you write a first draft, read it afresh by putting on the hat of your worst critic.

How would you counter what you yourself have written?
How would you argue against your own perspective?
How would you tear down what you have written?

Now, all this is happening inside your brain, so be absolutely brutal.

No, don’t stop with, ‘This is all nonsense, and you are an idiot’. That’s just ad hominem trolling. Picture yourself as an informed critic. Argue against your well-reasoned points and perspectives. If you are sharing an opinion, argue against it – counter that opinion with its opposite. Imagine yourself to be someone who holds the opposite opinion.

I do this for every single thing I do online. Even for one-line tweets that may seem otherwise totally harmless, including, ‘I love paneer’ – these days, you may get maximum hate online for something as innocuous as that 🙂

And this becomes a quick mental exercise as you get better at the idea.

What this does to your piece of draft content is this:

1. It helps you ascertain your own position better.

Many a time, I have gone back on my initial position after I cross-question my own premise. It could be a perspective on a piece of news or a piece of marketing communication. But when I question my perspective, it leads me to read more about it, read other perspectives, and inform myself better.

The more information you have on any given topic, the better it is to form your perspectives around it.

2. It helps you reframe the way you have articulated something.

Just because you find a valid counter-point to your perspective, it does not mean you need to change your opinion or perspective. It could happen when it is appropriate, but it is a default rule. The best way to put it to use is to help it rephrase and reframe what you have written.

For instance, if you are criticizing a product or service, you may have used extreme negative words like ‘horrible’, or ‘pathetic’. When you counter your perspective as a mental exercise, you could counter-argue with yourself: Aren’t you working for a service organization too? How would you feel if someone, for legitimate reasons, called your service ‘pathetic’? Wouldn’t you feel really bad that they chose to vent directly in public online without giving the official handle a chance to fix things?

So, what would you do with this awareness? You would go back and rephrase your content. Instead of framing it as a negative extreme (horrible, pathetic, etc.), you would frame it as your personal disappointment. ‘I was disappointed with the service’ sounds a lot more reasonable/reasoned than, ‘That brand’s after-sales service was pathetic’. It also reflects better on you as an individual – it presents you as a consciously thoughtful person who is credible and well-meaning even when criticizing something.

This is the essence of personal branding – putting your best version to the world of strangers. You are still yourself – you are not faking a personality. You are just being thoughtful in what you share. Why?

Because sharing something online is not an impulsive exercise.

It requires as much care as driving a car on a busy highway.

It is the equivalent of saying something in the middle of a busy street.

It is the equivalent of going on stage and addressing a million (potentially) people in the audience. Don’t be fooled by your number of followers, whatever it is – 10, 200, 3,000, 12,000, or 100,000. It can potentially reach every person online is the point. And almost all of them are strangers with whom you cannot say, ‘Oh, c’mon… how can you think like that! You know me, right?’. No, they do not know you. They are strangers. This is why the Step 2 (above) is very, very important.

Would you impulsively blabber anything that comes to your mind while on the stage addressing a million people? Of course not. Would you blabber something impulsively when among friends/family? Oh yes. Why the difference? Because, in the latter, you are addressing strangers who do not know you, while in the latter, people do know you. The former action does not mean you are not being yourself. You *are. You are just more thoughtful, measured, and careful in what you say and this is plain common sense.

3. It helps you prepare yourself better for the kind of reactions you may get.

When you counter your own views and perspectives, you are better prepared when you hear them from others, in response to what you have shared. Of course, you cannot anticipate every conceivable counterpoint, but being as thorough as possible really helps.

This is almost like chess. You learn to anticipate at least 2-3 moves in advance, if not more. You may choose to not engage with all those counterpoints in the reply, but being better prepared helps you address some of them better… earlier.


So, there are legitimate ways to move beyond, “What if something I say online becomes controversial and I get trolled?”.

It requires thought and planning. It may seem daunting the way I have explained it above, but trust me, you will get used to the rhythm much faster than you realize. In fact, ‘Being your worst critic’ is a handy tactic for a lot of things in life before doing something or uttering something. It helps be a better person in most cases.

Of course, all this does not mean you won’t say something wrong at some point online (or offline, for that matter). We are human, and we all make mistakes, more than once. I have said things online that I have regretted too, later. I have been trolled for something I said without thinking through it fully. But being thoughtful and considerate more often than not can help when you do fall out of line once in a while. It helps those who follow you (still strangers, but those who think they know you because they follow you consistently) give you the benefit of the doubt that your recent utterance was uncharacteristic and an aberration… not your real self.

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